Sunday, September 20, 2009

here it goes again

autumn is here
my thoughts aren't all here
time to start blogging again
soon; very soon

I'll be back

Thursday, March 12, 2009

long long time

I've been really lame at this whole blog thing lately but it's never too late to get back into it...I guess things have just been a bit too hectic in order for me to take the time to write some thoughts.

I've ended up in the hospital TWICE since my last post. The first time consisted of a three day stay while the last (hopefully for good!!!) stay consisted of eleven long and gruesome days. I guess that being young and not ever having to be at the hospital has now become a foreign thing for me. Sad to say but I almost got the hang of being there, of seeing all those people in times of desperation and questioning. Staying there really made me realize how quickly things can change and how important it is to really appreciate what your given.

Thankfully, I'm feeling much better and I'm slowly getting back into my routine. My first week back at school is almost done and I need to be back to all of my regular tasks and activities next it or not.

In addition, winter is over in eight days...this terrible terrible season over in eight days. I'm positive that spring will bring great things that will shine over the darker situations brought along by winter. One day at a time and all will fall back into place

Thursday, February 12, 2009

looking past the negative

I am strong enough to do this...
Weakness is not an excuse & should never be
I don't want to end up there again.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009


I'm just too weak to do this
Just way too weak

Friday, January 30, 2009

where is my ground control...

I previously said that I see things getting back on track and expected life to look brighter in the following hours, days, weeks, or months. I was wrong...I was so terribly wrong. 2009 has only been here for a month yet it has been so terribly unkind to me. It makes me wonder if I've done anything to deserve this...I'm quite sorry if I did.

I got some terrible and harsh news earlier this week. As I previously mentioned, I got my ear pierced and it was causing a lot of pain. On Tuesday I decided that I didn't want to deal with this pain anymore so I chose to go to the clinic. After waiting 3 and a half hours (with no music or cellphone because my iPhone was dead!!!) I got called into the doctor's office. The doctor, an arrogant son of a bitch, checked out my ear and told me I had cellulitus. It's not the unattractive craters women get on their legs so this little monster could not be healed with Nivea Good Bye Cellulite cream. Cellulitus is an infection of the different layers of inner skin that is characterized by red skin, burning sensation, rapid swelling. Hearing this was already a blow to my emotional stability but to make the situation even better the doctor casually told me that I could die from this because it can turn into a meningitis. That's an infection of the membrane surrounding the brain, so you can imagine how shocked I was when I heard this.

I got home and things were not looking better. Long story short, I went to the hospital and was taken in right away. I didn't expect that I would be there for a long time, but I was wrong. After taking my piercing out, which was not enjoyable at all, I was given antibiotics through intravenous injections. I stayed two nights, two nights too many, in the hospital where I got the chance to meet a few interesting characters while I was there. Overall, my stay there was not pleasant due to the bad food, all the antibiotics I was on, the pain, the sleepless nights, the loneliness. Thankfully, I had two visitors, my mother and father, who kept me company and tried to keep my hopes up. I'm grateful to be at home with my own personal belongings that I've grown to appreciate more. I don't ever wat to be away from home like that ever again.

In all, January was a terrible month for me, hopefully all this negativity will fall behind with this month. I think I just need to set some goals and things to do for the next couple of months in order to keep myself occupied and always busy. It's time for me to hit the sack again...'till next time.

Monday, January 26, 2009

back to the routine

FIRST OFF...I'm sorry blog for being so lame and not writing. I've had a very painful week due to a new piercing which resulted in me being very unproductive towards everything. Hopefully, it will heal soon and I'll be back to my normal self. Damn you conch piercing and your complications!

Call me crazy, but I'm somewhat happy that I'm back at school. It feels nice to wake up and know you have something to do that day instead of wasting away at home. I get to eat at regular hours and follow my eating original eating habits (hopefully meaning that there will be more weight loss coming my way!!!). I'm looking forward to this semester because it is my last one and I think it will be one filled with learning experience and one where I'll have to make important decisions. I want to give a big thank you to one of my teachers, David Finch, who helped me open my eyes about the obstacles that are to come and what people are going to expect of me based on my field of studies. If you're reading this David-wouldn't be surprised if you were-thank you for being a great listener and such an inspiring person.

Things hit a low before but I think that they're slowly getting back on track. What goes up must come down, but that doesn't mean things always have to stay down. I took a momentary detour on my life path or simply put happiness, but now I'm on the right track again. Let's hope that nothing will stop me again from heading that way.
this is the little devil causing all of my pain